lullaby

the world sleeps in night’s embrace

the earth is still, dreams take flight

but i do not sleep

i cannot will myself to take comfort in night’s lullaby

i stay awake, and my mind wanders

thoughts flash, like streaks of falling stars

illuminating the landscape of my thoughts

i look up and the sky, clear like day, opens and reveals your face

i took a step but the chasm that divides us is far too great

i can only gaze, for we are apart

your image blurs and i say ‘wait’

your smile fading quickly as the night gives way to dawn

no goodbyes, and  the tears did not fall

for at dusk, i might get a glimpse of heaven yet again.

espresso shots- inception

“i found myself falling, although i do not remember why i was there or what made me fall. after a few seconds, or was it hours? i was on my feet, standing on top of a snow-capped mountain, in the middle of a mountain range. i should have been overwhelmed by the sight that lay before me, but i wasn’t, and then i opened my eyes and i awoke.”

chris nolan’s latest offering is probably one of the most intelligent films i have ever seen. although highly intellectual, this movie does not alienate the regular, casual movie goer.

before i saw this film, i have read countless reviews online about how awesome this movie is and how christopher nolan has set the bar again  for hollywood movies. he just proved yet again that a movie does not have to be dumb and full of explosions to be commercially successful.

the actors he cast were perfect and they played their roles like they were born for it. leonardo di caprio can still be counted on to deliver and he has indeed grown up from being jack. 🙂

the movie’s plot, when you think about it is very simple: planting an idea into someone’s mind through a dream so that the dreamer would ultimately think that the idea was actually his. and chris nolan has weaved an intricate story about how powerful dreams are. what we dismiss as mere creations of our subconscious are actually the building blocks of our reality.

the movie opens with a scene from someone else’s dream and the viewer is made to believe that the movie would end how it began. a lot of writers use this device to make the story interesting and mr. nolan used this in such a way that although the movie is complete when the credits roll, the ending would still be left to our interpretation.

i see a lot of discussions long after the movie has ended. and i think that is how good movies should be: and escape and at the same time can fuel intellectual discussions.

when i said the casual movie goer would not be alienated, i meant that even though this is a ‘thinking’ movie, the viewer would not be hard pressed to figure out what this movie is all about. half-way through the movie, one would have a pretty good grasp of what the writer would wish to convey. and since this is also a hollywood film, the producers did not scrimp on the special effects. the dreamscapes were amazing and the action sequences could rival any jerry bruckheimer production.

the movie has something for everyone. and unless you’re the type who would rather shut down your brain when watching a movie, ‘inception’ would not really give you a hard time thinking. but it would certainly open ideas.

go see it, twice even. 🙂

‎“What’s the most resilient parasite? An Idea. A single idea from the human mind can build cities. An idea can transform the world and rewrite all the rules. “- Dom Cobb, Inception

inked

two years ago, i got my first tattoo. i have thought about getting one since i was in college but i only had the courage to get one a couple of years after. yes, it was painful but this kind of pain was worth it.

the very first tattoo i got was a cross with some japanese characters beside it which meant ‘powerful.’ when people ask me what these images stand for, i say that this is a statement of my faith. etched on my skin is the loudest statement of who and what i believe in.

a few months after, i got these:

three stars. honestly, i don’t know what they mean. i just got them because i think they look nice. seriously. but then again, the middle star is called a ‘nautical star’ which sailors use to guide them in the right direction. and i guess that’s what my stars mean to me. these stars make sure that whatever decision i make, it should always be in the ‘right direction.’ 🙂

so after two years, i think it’s time to add more because my stars look lonely. of course it shouldn’t be just anything random. i’ve had enough of random tattoos, i think it’s about time that i choose a design that would mean something.

although it’s still up in the air, i have browsed countless sites for inspiration and i found one:

well not exactly like in the picture, but something close to that. i have always wanted to bring my stars together, and for my forearm to be covered in ink. seriously. and i’m pretty sure i’d be getting something like this.

i’ll post the design once i made my decision. can’t wait! 🙂

p.s. i’m also of getting some on my back. if you have something in mind, share your thoughts.

white flag

i made a mistake and i feel like i have betrayed myself. i knew that this would happen, deep in my heart i knew. and in a classic move made by me, i let the pieces fall knowing i would be the only one to pick them up. a recurring scene that keeps on playing as if on an extended loop.

i have always been honest with myself and i take pride in the fact that i always knew the risks involved. and like what i have always said: in the morning i will be okay.

and that’s true. i am truly okay.

i had a conversation with a friend yesterday and she wanted to know my perspective on loving. it was very interesting because when i was dishing out my selfish philosophies, i realized that these beliefs helped me understand the complexities of love.

i told her that there’s always a risk involved and it would be up to you if you would be willing to risk it or not. that there would be always pain and it would be your call if you would want to stop hurting or the pain is still worth it to continue loving.

you cannot control what the other person feels but you can control how you feel. you control yourself, even if you’re throwing yourself at someone whom you haven’t have the slightest idea if the feeling would be mutual, you would still be in control. although it takes a lot of will to keep yourself from getting carried away. i told her that one should leave something for himself so that when everything falls apart, one would have something to build on.

i am picking up the pieces and i am okay. the pain is worth it. but i am putting an end to it.

i am waving the white flag of surrender, i couldn’t afford the risk anymore.

espresso shots – life lessons from toy story 3

i hate going to the movies alone. the last time i did was back in college, i played hooky a lot. 🙂

i convinced my brother to come see toy story 3 with me and of course after much bullying, he relented. he said yes and i reserved our seats online knowing that the movie house would be packed today.

in a classic brotherly move, he stood me up. i ended up paying for two tickets and watching the movie alone. i was a little irritated of course but then i realized we lived in the same house, retribution is sure to hound my dearly beloved brother.

the first toy story movie was shown in 1995, i was in grade school then, a little older than andy but i was still into toys. i remember seeing the movie with my family, my brother included, and was amazed at how the animators were able to come up with a movie like this one.

i vaguely remember watching the second one because i think i was too busy with my life and i probably bought a bootleg dvd of that one.

i was expecting this movie to be your regular computer-generated movie: lots of visual effects with very little story. but i was pleasantly surprised to to find out that this movie is a very grown up one.

the kids would love this for sure, but the grown ups would leave the movie house with something to think about too. by the end of the movie, when the story draws to a close, i felt a little bittersweet. same feeling i had when the credits were shown in the lord of the rings trilogy. but more than that, this animated movie made me think about one very important life lesson: letting go and moving on.

when we were kids our lives were very predictable and leaving, loving, heartbreak were probably words we never used.

then we grew up. we learned that there are times that we need to let go and we need to leave someone or something behind. but then again, i have always found it hard to let go especially to people who have been a part of my life. people who made me who i am. people i loved.

moving on is a process i have gone through a lot of times and let me tell you, it’s not easy. it’s not easy to let go of something you have been doing for a long time. it’s hard to let go of someone you have loved so much and is a part of who you are. but i have learned to make the process a little easier to bear.

the toys made me realize how it is really to move on.

at the onset of a breakup or somebody leaving, we tend to have fears. we’re afraid that we might not be the same without that person. we have built our lives around a concept that our lives are connected and when we lose the connection, we would just fall apart and we would never be the same again.

but woody, buzz and the rest of the toys made me think about how i handle the demise of a relationship. in my opinion, that alone made the movie powerful.

the toys didn’t fight to win andy’s affection, they knew that andy would someday grow up and leave them behind. however, just like many of us, they didn’t like to be thrown away. all they wanted was to stay in the attic where andy could always find them whenever he needs them-if he needs them. and that’s what the whole movie was all about: making someone realize that moving on doesn’t always have to be hard, the worst it can be is to be a bittersweet ending.

and that’s what i felt when the credit rolled, that bittersweet feeling when i let go of a relationship. i do not cut the ties, i just loosen them. no person is bound to us forever. we just have to cross our fingers and hope that when we do move on, it would be to something better. and that’s something we can’t prepare for.

the movie was great. and being a kids’ movie, it doesn’t have those sappy, awkward long pauses with a sad song playing in the background. the creators have done a good job. toy story 3 is a neat little ribbon to wrap up the whole franchise.