cofiboi on hush, hush

hush, hush by becca fitzpatrick was touted to be the next ‘twilight.’ i was really hoping that this wasn’t the case when i bought the book.

i was right, it wasn’t some twilight rip-off. it was worse.

personally, i think stephanie meyer’s vampire/teenage romance novels was the worst thing that happened to young-adult fiction. when i was reading the series, i had a bottle of aspirin handy. my head hurt from hating bella and edward so much. i really don’t see the point why these books were ever written. bella’s personality was as thin as paper and the other characters are cheap imitations of anne rice’s vampires. but i read the books so that i could justify hating them. let me correct myself, i don’t hate the books, i loathe them. if there was a stronger adjective, i would’ve used it.

but i digress. this is about becca fitzpatrick’s debut into the very lucrative  young-adult fantasy/fiction genre. her book, at 391 pages long highlights the story of a teenage girl (apparently, heroines very common in this genre) named nora grey, and a mysterious (aren’t they all?) boy called patch.

reading this book was an ordeal. and it’s setting would always remind you of the places in twilight. fortunately, the similarities end there. at first, i thought that was a good thing. but halfway through the book, the reader would still be in the dark as to what the story really is. character development is nonexistent. nora, and her best friend vee (another major character in the book) sound alike, and the main antagonist in the book, the guy wearing a black ski mask, is not that interesting. and patch, the love interest sounds like a badly written goth james dean.

when the story reaches its climax and the truth is revealed, it leaves more questions and a slightly bitter aftertaste. the plot is flimsy and the author didn’t even bother to shed some light on why these events are happening.  the book can actually be summed up in one sentence: a story about a fallen angel who falls in love with a girl and wants to be human to be with the girl forever. that’s the book in a nutshell.

the plot is uninspired, boring and a total waste of time.

cofiboi says, do not but this book. but if you are really interested, try to download an ebook of this. 🙂

If torture is what you’re after, you’re better off reading Stephanie Meyer.

cofiboi, the bookworm

i bought two books yesterday and i’m done reading one.

i bought becca fitzpatrick’s ‘hush hush’ and michael scott’s ‘the alchemyst’

i posted a status message on facebook that i was planning to buy books and was needing suggestions. a couple of friends replied with interesting titles. and of course, like the good sleuth that i am, i googled one of the titles and i got this:

interesting cover, huh?

will tell you all about the book once i get over my newfound hatred for the author and her chosen genre. yes, the book is THAT bad. do not, i repeat, do not buy this book. i should have read the reviews first before shelling out a couple of hundred pesos.

i will try to be objective. but i can’t right now, so my review would have to be delayed.

good thing michael scott is there to convince me that the young-adult fiction genre is more than bella and edward. i’m halfway through the first book in his nicholas flamel series and so far i am liking it.

and once i’m done reading, i’ll post my thoughts here. 🙂

so far, this book looks promising. 🙂

missing

i think i need my heart back now.

oh, you didn’t know you had it the whole time? well, i kind of slipped it inside your pocket while you were sleeping.

i guess you didn’t notice it was there. i hope it’s not in bad shape. hearts are very fragile objects you know.

when it fit your pocket, i thought that it would fit you too. but i guess i was mistaken.

in any case, i’ll be needing my heart back. i kind of missed it. i’m surprised i lasted this long without it with me. but i don’t think i want to do that any longer. you’ll never know when someone else might need it.

but thanks for carrying it anyway, even if you didn’t know that it was there. was the beating too faint and vague to hear? well i guess you were listening to other things then for you not to notice the tinny tiny sound a broken heart makes.

well, it’s not like it has never been broken before. or that you haven’t held it and shattered it to pieces. you have and you did. it took a while to find the missing pieces and solving the puzzle, but it became whole again.

that’s why i thought that i’d share it with you again.

but you didn’t notice it was there.

so i think i need it back. there’s a huge hole in my chest and it’s missing a huge chunk.

one more favor i need to ask of you, please close the door when you leave. i left it open for you, but now i think i’ll wait til somebody knocks again.

one more time with feelings

it’s just too bad i didn’t bring a decent camera. we turned out to be silly little tourist camwhores. 🙂

i read somewhere that in order for one not to be too stressed out (from work, school or life in general), one should have at least four planned vacations each year. then i thought to myself: i already had two, i got two more to go!

right after we got back from cebu, i started making plans for singapore. i was dead set on going there, but then i realized that i’d be going back to school next semester, so my singapore plans would have to be put on hold. sigh.

there’s always next year, though.

going back, i was in cebu about two weeks ago and it was probably one of the best vacations i have ever had. and this time, unlike the last, i had my trusty tag-along friend show me around. it was amazing.

of course, i had to take the window seat. tag-along friend took the aisle. and in between us was some weird lady who had halitosis. so the flight to cebu was pretty uneventful. even the cabin crew were unattractive. bummer.

we weren’t the only tourists on board. there were europeans, americans and a lot of koreans. i think i could pass as one of them, just like the last time. but sadly, my knowledge of the korean language is way below zero. well, i could manage to say ‘hello’ and ‘i love you (like inday badiday)’ but that’s about it.

when we got to cebu, hilton arranged our transfer and we were riding in this:

first class indeed. 🙂

and then we were whisked to paradise:

our gratification would be delayed because we had to go to a wedding, which was about an hour away from our hotel. well, it’s not that bad, especially when we got to see this:

the bride and groom were my friends and they should be somewhere in this picture. 🙂 i just loved the sunset here.

after the wedding, the tag-along friend and i joined a couple of friends from kindergarten to a not-so-kindergarten after party. and we got drunk on beer and smooth reggae.

here’s the aftermath:

and then we got back to the hotel way past midnight. good thing there were still some cabs who were willing to take us back to the hilton considering it’s on another island. i’m not kidding.

one of the best things to do when on a vacation is to get drunk and do crazy, wild things. well, one out of two isn’t bad. right?

the fates were kind to us, tourists because we didn’t have any hangover though tag-along friend was a bit grumpy. but then morning welcomed us with a bright ray of sunshine (i sound like a commercial)

our view from our room on the 18th floor. we didn’t get the beach front room though but i’m not complaining.

let me tell you, the breakfast buffet at the hilton is AMAZING. really. and there was this mountain of bacon. with that alone, i’m sold! sorry, i didn’t get to take a picture of it though. they might think i’m a tourist. haha! 🙂

then it was off to the beach, and it was absolutely gorgeous (i’m running out of superlatives here)

this shot was taken from my 3 megapixel phone camera.

on top of my list was getting a tan, just like malibu barbie’s/ken’s. and so, with my grumpy tag-along friend in tow, and my hawaiian tropic tanning lotion (i didn’t get the nivea tanning oil, apparently all stores in manila run out of them), i embraced the cancer-causing sun rays and really soaked up the sun.

thats me before i took off the black ‘sando’

and fortunately for us, there was this noontime show themed company outing in the background so we got to enjoy the beach watching three kids dancing to the ‘nobody’

it was freaky, but hey, we had entertainment.

grumpy tag-along friend said that you haven’t been to cebu until you have tried SUTUKIL, and try i did.

well, it was nothing fancy but i guess there’s something about eating obscene amounts of seafood while on vacation. diet is the first one out of the window. his words, not mine. i am not on a diet, never have been. i am actually trying to gain more weight.

and pigging out was the order of the day. i even got to eat clams!

i know, the thing looks weird, but i generally don’t eat shellfish. but since i’m on vacation, i would make this an exception.

of course, our pink hotel experience isn’t complete without us, riding on the iconic pink jeepney. how redundant. 🙂

i am such a tourist. well, i’m not the only one who has his picture taken with the pink jeepney, my grumpy tag-along friend has one too. but i don’t think he’s willing to come out as a tourist yet. 🙂

the ayala mall in cebu quaint. just like the malls we have here in manila, but of course, i had to have my picture taken. for posterity’s sake, of course.

of course after this shot was taken, all i wanted to do was to jump in. but we didn’t do that. we had one more place to go to before we eat cebu’s famous lechon.

grumpy tag-along friend, being the tour guide, suggested that we visit my ancestors and pay our due respects. i thought we were going to a cemetery.

we went to the taoist temple instead (whew). although it’s a major tourist attraction. there’s really nothing to see there except for temples and stone statues of chinese gods. i’m chinese, but i don’t speak the language. all german to me. 😉

do i look like a tourist to you?

and after ringing my bell…

we decided to head on back. but not before saying goodbye to my new found friend (and i think grumpy tag-along friend got jealous)

awww, he wants me to stay…

we spent two nights at the hilton and then moved on to another hotel because we felt like we needed one more night. we weren’t ready to go home yet. and cebu wasn’t going to let us go home without giving us this beautiful sunset:

sigh, i could live here forever

and the hotel wasn’t bad at all. it was in fact, cute. not as grand like the hilton, but it had it’s charms.

four days isn’t enough. i wanted to stay there longer. like forever.

but then we had to go back. back to our sandless, beachless daily lives.

gawa-gawa ni cofiboi

i told you guys before that i used to write fiction. now i’m picking up where i left off.

i write these stories in tagalog because i feel like i can express myself better.

the first part of this mini-series has been running around my head since i got back back from my cebu trip.

i hope you guys will find the time to read and probably comment on my stories. i say it’s fiction but i think my stories have roots in my own personal experiences. most of them would be told in first person so i hope you guys will like it. 🙂

“BITIN”

Alas 9:00. Maaga pa.

Siguro mga dalawa o tatlong hithit pa ‘to.

“Uy beks, pumasok na tayo, nang makarami” Aya ni Ardee. Ang kaibigan kong haligi na ng Malate. Tingin ko nga isa siya sa mga taong pasimuno ng mga tambayan dito. Institusyon kung baga.

“Wow, parang may quota ka ah. Nagmamadali ka ba?” Sagot ko sa kanyang nagmamadaling imbitasyon.

“Hay, alam mo naman ang kalakaran dito. Baka kasi maunahan tayo. Wala nang mabentang lalake pag pumatak na ang hatinggabi”

Hindi na ako sumagot. Hindi rin naman kasi ako mahilig sa ganitong lugar. Gastos lang. May entrance fee na, bitin pa sa beer. Pero ayos na rin, masaya naman kasama si Ardee, pati yung barkada niyang tambay din ng Malate. Maiingay. Laging masaya, parang gumising lang sila para pumunta dito.

“At andun na raw sina Robert, may papakilala daw sa ‘yo” nakangiti siya.

Parang isa sa mga misyon niya sa buhay ay hanapan ako ng lalake. Sa lugar na to.

May mahahanap ka nga bang relasyon dito? Sing bilis ng pagpalit ng kanta ang palitan ng lalaki. Parang damit lang. Parang isang round ng beer.

“Oo na, ayan na nga eh…” sabay patay sa sigarilyo kong nagbabaga.

Mga tatlong buwan na rin kaming ganito ni Ardee. Tuwing Huwebes at Sabado, laman kami ng mga bar sa Malate. Minsan kaming dalawa lang, pero madalas may mga kasama ring sa Malate lang din namin nakikita.

Minsan nga natatanong ko sa aking sarili kung bakit ako napunta sa lugar na to. Hindi naman ako mahilig gumimik. Hindi talaga ako gumigimik. Naiingayan kasi ako. At pare-pareho lang din naman ang makikita mo. O di kaya, sa sobrang dilim ng lugar, wala ka talagang makikita. Bukod na lang sa mga anino ng mga katawang naghahanap ng panandaliang saya. Pagsapit ng umaga, babalik sa kani-kanilang lungga at maghihintay ulit ng kagat ng dilim.

Mula nang malaman ni Ardee na bakla ako, naging bokasyon na niyang i-introduce ako sa buhay bakla. Sa kanyang mga salita: “I’m going to lift the rainbow curtain for you. I promise you, you’re going to have fun!”

May diin sa salitang FUN.

Ako naman, dahil bored at naghahanap ng magagawa, sumama. Aaminin ko, may mga gabi rin namang  naging masaya ako. May inuwi at naiuwi. Ganyan ang sistema dito. Isasayaw ka, pag natipuhan ka; siguro dahil sa pabango mo, o di kaya sa iyong pag-indayog o di kaya’y dala lang ng kalasingan, alam mo na ang kasunod. Ang mga tao dito, mas nauunang makikipaglaplapan bago makipagkilala. Kung sabagay, ganito rin naman siguro sa kahit saang bar.

Nakaka-excite rin kung minsan. Dito mo kasi nalalaman kung ikaw nga ay bebenta pa sa mga mapanuring mata ng mga maarteng bakla. Hindi pa naman ako umuuwing mag-isa mula nang mapadpad ako dito. Mabenta pa nga siguro ako.

Pumasok na kami sa bar. Maaga pa, pero napupuno na ng mga tao ang first floor. Puro lalaki. Kung may babae man, hindi mo na mapapansin, mga dayo sila. Turista sa mundong nabubuhay sa gabi.

Tumuloy kami sa isang sulok. Naghinintay dun ang mga kaibgan ni Ardee. Kaibigan niya kasi hindi ko naman talaga sila ganun kakilala. Tamang ngiti lang at konting tango ng ulo. At may kasamang beso.

Gaya ng nakagawian, bebeso kami sa kanila. Magbibigay pugay sa mga reyna/hari. Maingay na ang lugar. Nagsisimula nang mapuno ang dance floor. Kanya-kanyang sayaw habang hawak ang bote ng beer. Siguro mas astig pag may hawak kang beer. Habang sumasayaw ka ay panay lagok mo naman sa inumin mo. Magaling pala mag-multi task kaming mga bading: sasayaw, lalagok, lalandi at sasabayan ng konting kwento sa katabi. Pero, hindi rin naman namin naiintindihan ang isa’t isa. Wala kasing marinig dahil sa ugong ng musikang tekno at house. Nakakahilo ang bawat patay sindi ng black lights at strobe lights. Unti-unting nababalot ng usok ang paligid. At ako naman, tahimik na nagmamasid. Tinitimpla pa ang mood. Isang alak pa, sasayaw na rin ako.

“Jed, right?” sigaw/bulong sa akin ng taong nagngangalang Robert.

Pansamantalang natigil ang aking pagmamasid at lumingon sa kanya. “Yeah” sagot ko.

“Hey, this is my friend, TJ” sabay pakilala sa akin sa isang taong hindi ko maaninag. Nang sandaling lumapat ang ilaw sa mukha ni TJ, nakita ko rin ang kanyang histura. Mukhang mestiso. Maganda ang ngiti. Sinuklian ko rin ng ngiti.

“What’s up, dude? TJ, pare” Sigaw/bulong ni TJ. Na-turn off ako.

Dude? Sa lahat ng pwedeng pagpapakilala, sinimulan niya ako ng ‘dude’. Gusto ko sanang sabihing “How’s it going, dudette?” Pero ngumiti lang ako. Kunyari hindi ko siya narinig.

“O ayan, play nice. Sasayaw lang kami ni Ardee, para makaswerte din” sabay tayo at alis ni Robert.

Naiwan kami sa sulok. Ang dude at ako.

Siguro sa ibang gabi, nakisayaw na rin ako at nakipaglandian sa kanya. Pero ngayon, pagod ako. At dahil hindi mga masyadong maganda ang simula, nanatili akong tahimik, best friend ko si San Miguel.

Sumayaw si TJ sa harap ko at sabay sigaw ng: “Man, I love this song!”

Hindi ko alam na mahilig pala ‘tong ‘dude’ na to kay Madonna. Ngumiti lang ako at pilit sinasabayan ang kanyang mga galaw. Kahit siguro mag-funky chicken ako dito walang papansin. Pero di ko gagawin yun.

Hindi na siya nakuntento sa pagsasayaw, bigla niya akong nilapit sa kanya at bumulong sa tenga ko: “Pare, you’re so hot, wanna bounce and have some fun at my place?”

Fun? Bakit, maglalaro ba tayo ng twister?

Hindi ko namang sinasabing ayaw ko sa kanya. Ayaw ko lang siguro ng ‘fun’ ng mga panahong iyon. Wala ako sa mood.

“Let’s just dance and see what happens, ‘kay?” pagtatanggi ko sabay order ng isa pang beer.

Marahil  matatapos ang gabing to gaya ng ibang gabing napapadpad ako dito: uuwi kami sa apartment niya, magkakaroon ng ‘fun,’ at pagdating ng umaga uuwi ako sa amin na may hangover.

Pag-abot sa aking ng pangalawa kong bote, bago ko pa man mailapat ang bibig ko sa labi ni San Miguel, ang labi ni TJ ang nauna. Nagulat ako. Madiin siyang humalik. May konting lasa ng sigarilyo. Pero mukha namang nag-toothbrush bago mag-yosi.

‘Minty’ isip ko.

“You’re such a cute couple!”

Biglang epal ng isang lalaking kamukha ni Sonny Parsons. Yung palaging kontrabida sa mga pelikula dati. May hawak siyang kamera. Nagulat ako, pero mukhang sanay na si TJ sa mga ganitong tagpo.

Nalaman kong isa pla sa mga may-ari ng bar si Sonny Parsons. Siguro hindi ganun kaganda ang ngiti ko sa picture kaya hindi ito na-post sa website. Si TJ lang, kasama ang iba’t ibang lalaki. Ang ‘dude’.

Buti naman at hindi na kami ininterview ni Sonny Parsons. Hindi ko kasi alam ang mga isasagot ko kung nagkaganon. Pag-alis niya, binalikan namin ni TJ ang aming naudlot na pinagkakaabalahan.

Mas marahan na siya ngayon. May konting lambing ang bawat higop. At hindi kalaunan, nakipaglaro na rin ang aking dila. FUN.

Konting lambing pa, isip ko, at papatulan ko na yang offer mo. Kinilig ako. May tama na nga siguro ako. Isa pa.

“Wait” sabi ko, sabay layo ng kaunti “I need to pee.”

“Oh okay… “ hindi agad siya bumitaw. Pero naiihi na talaga ako. Ayoko namang magkasakit sa bato dahil lang sa isang halik.

“Promise, babalik ako” hindi ko alam kung bakit ko kelangang sabihin yun. Alam ko namang babalik ako sa kanya pagkatapos kong maihi. Sure ball na ‘to eh.

“Alright, but I’m gonna come with” tingin niya siguro hindi na ako babalik.

“Okay, let’s better go up, puputok na pantog ko” minsan talaga panira ng moment ang beer. Nag-e-enjoy na rin naman ako, bigla pa akong maiihi.

Umakyat kami sa second floor. Doon kasi ang CR. Walang pinto, at walang karatula na ‘male.’ May aquarium sa gitna na nagsisilbing divider ng urinal. Ayos din. Bakit ka nga naman mahihiyang itago yan, eh malamang yan din naman ang makikita mo bago matapos ang gabi.

Naghintay siya sa labas. At doon sa loob, habang nagtataas ako ng zipper, nakita kong pumasok ka. Ewan ko ba kung bakit kita napansin, ang dami rin namang lalaki dun. At nasa labas lang si TJ. Pero siguro nga dahil ikaw lang ang nakita kong nakasuot ng sombrero kaya kita napansin. At ang white mong t-shirt na hapit. Nagsusumigaw na: “OO NAGWO-WORKOUT AKO!”

“You done?” Tanong ni TJ. Tumango ako at lumabas ang banyo. Kasunod lang pala kita. Ang bilis mo naman umihi. O baka naman pumasok ka lang dun para manilip? Ewan.

Hindi ko rin alam kung anung pumasok sa isip ko nang sabihin ko kay TJ na bigla akong nahilo at gusto kong magpaiwan dito sa taas. Pero mukhang ayaw niya akong pakawalan. Sasamahan daw niya ako dito. Unti-unting humahaba ang aking buhok.

Sinulyapan kita at nakita sa may bar. Mag-isa. Walang kasayaw o kausap. Paano ko ba madidispatsya si TJ? At bakit ko ba kelangang lumapit sa yo?

Andito lang si TJ. Mukhang matino naman. At siya ang naunang nag-offer ng FUN.

Siguro nga ayaw ko ng hindi nahihirapan. Kelangan may ‘challenge.’ Hindi naman kasi ako nakasisiguro na pagtapos ng gabing to, pag naiwan ko na ang kasama ko, ay ikaw ang kausap ko. Bahala na.

Naisip ko bigla na sana may hawak akong beer ngayon. O kahit anong alcohol, para maisakatuparan ang mga plano ko. Isang gabi lang.

Minsan lang akong maging kupal. At sa tingin ko, hindi ko naman siguro kailangang magpaliwanag sa kahit kanino. Makakahanap din si TJ ng kapareha, maaga pa naman.

ITUTULOY… 🙂